Introducing A new Guru: Failure

90% of you will fail–miserably. Waking up on your death bed, farting into your freshly starched hospital sheets and groaning, “Pudding please?”

You were supposed to be the next Nirvana. The next Bukowski. The next You…

Where are you right now? Unplug your eyes and look around. What time is it?

What’s one thing you should do today? What’s one thing you keep procrastinating on?

Do this…really do it. Close your eyes and imagine yourself completing the task you’ve been avoiding, over, and over. Actually feel so excited because you got it done. What’s the reward? What do you look like? Imagine yourself finishing that task and reaping the reward.

Close your eyes and do that for one minute.

…..

You’re not stupid. You’re not weird. You’re not bad looking. You’re not too shy. You’re not broke. You are actually pretty cool. So what’s holding you back in so many areas?

Last night I did my laundry, brought back the basket and dropped it on my floor. There it sat until morning. I get up, suck back coffee and start writing. I’ve got ten emails to reply to, a sink half full of dishes, tax papers on my desk, a pile of boingboing articles to read…

Arrgh.

I stop writing, sigh, stand up and finish my damn laundry. Done…aaaah.

Most of you lack results because you are scattered. You don’t finish what you start. You imagine there is somewhere better to be than right now. Yes…this is life. Every decision you have ever made led you right here…right now.

Humans are designed for success–but programmed for failure. We looooove the easy, quick validation; the candy bar or fast food, the prostitute, the couch and tv, the video game, the blog post…(As opposed to the book.)

You need to finish those little things. Walk the dog. Call your Mom. Clean your room. If your mind is scattered between dozens of tasks, it’s like bouncing off rubber walls.

Most of us are brainwashed by society, religion, the media, our friends. You think those are your choices? You actually think Chocolate is superior to Vanilla?

What if you had a choice? What if you could do, and believe, whatever you felt like. What if you could be bold? Daring? And entrepreneur, writer, athlete, sex god, model…

It’s funny. Most people aren’t aware their thoughts aren’t their own. That there is a little voice telling you what you deserve, how you should act, what you should wear, and eat, and say, and do…or not do. The Eternal Virgin. Tev.

I for one, refuse to live life as a slave. I will design life to suit me. I will shape reality to my making.

I’ll have more money.
More Love.
More Respect.
More Freedom.

And I’ll share it with everyone I can.

That’s a choice right there. And a public one. That’s me, creating my present, and my future. And guess what…I’ll fail. I’ll screw it up over, and over and over.

The eternal virgin will tell you, “You’re not good enough. Quit.”

Failure is the greatest teacher. It will never lie to you. It will never let you down. If you seek it, you will find it over and over. Failure will teach you more about life than any University or Guru.

If you want to meet Failure, all you need to do is knock on the door. But the more you visit, the less he will answer. He’s the gatekeeper.

Eventually Failure will get sick of your persistence…

…and you will be introduced to success.