|

You Think You Have Problems Because You Can’t Get Laid

boy with gun

I don’t have real angst

 

Not like war torn rape victims

HIV riddled convenience store beggars

Sex scandal politicians

Unemployed ex famous actors

Tiny dicked black men

 

But I have worries

 

Not like alcoholic test pilots

Balding hairdressers

Broke poker gurus

Angry life coaches

And your perpetually single, single mother

 

Life is just life

And we do the best we can

 

Before our gut sags

Our bones go brittle

Our friends forget our names and birthdays

And everything you wanted

Means nothing except for the burning question

Who will wipe my ass today and

Should I be buried or burned?

 

So play with the kids

Write your poetry book

Run through a field of daisies high on Ecstasy

Scream at orgasm so the neighbors cheer and hiss

Eat more ice cream

Sleep till 3pm and then take a nap

 

And when you wake up

From your dream

Give me a text

And I’ll complain

And you’ll complain

Because that’s what we do

 

But that’s the trick to comprehending

All this torment

 

We do…something

At least try

Similar Posts

  • |

    Aging

    I was brushing my teeth last night under the cruel florescent glare and noticed my thinning hairline. Also slight bags and creases around my eyes. Though not quite apparent yet, within a few years, they will be. The future: Here’s how it will go down: The hair will continue to retreat. It will be harder…

  • |

    Self

    There’s a woman beside me reading the paper, drinking a pint at 1:42 pm and belching softly into her fist. Beside her is a young girl with large thigh tattoos. She’s engaged in a valiant struggle with her twelve foot Mac cable. The cable is winning. Being single isn’t so bad A girlfriend read my…

  • |

    Montreal Pua Bootcamp

    Life Altering, Three Day Pua Bootcamp in Montreal Imagine if you had the ability to meet and attract beautiful women in Montreal, right off the street, with minimal fear or awkwardness, in the daytime. By using proven daygame strategies honed by seasoned professional dating coaches, you will erase your fears about approaching beautiful women in…

One Comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.