I’m working the blog again; one of my imaginary refuges from the cold hard world. When you’re sweating over a project for long stretches, it’s beneficial to step back and change focus. Because if you stare through a magnifying glass for too long, with too much intensity, you’ll burn a hole through your subject. It’s the same with developing your charisma; sometimes you need to chill out and work on other things; then return with a fresh perspective.

Today I want to talk about haters (boo!).

When I first started blogging my only goal was to attract potential clients in Vancouver BC and Montreal. I needed money because I was poor. I needed a hobby for my own sanity. Now my blog averages about 250 hits a day and I have about 300 subscribers. That’s not much in the Internet marketing world, but for me, it’s pretty awesome. Hopefully when this book is finally done it will go viral and I’ll make enough money to travel the world and love friendly, foreign women. I don’t need much money—only about $2000 a month in passive income and I’ll be fine.

When I was learning pickup in 2006, my first goal was to get a few phone numbers and dates. Then I wanted to sleep with certain kinds of girls–which I did (kids cheering). Then I wanted to have a few one night stands—so I did that too (condoms). Then I wanted a girlfriend, so I got one of those. I discovered you can do anything if you put your mind to it. Picture a Unicorn sliding down a rainbow: That’s how winning feels.

So what does losing feel like? It’s an empty cup. It’s a sense of lacking. It feels like Bambi did when his mother was shot. It’s no good. It’s a realization that you will never be complete, you will never have a perfect body or a perfect mind, you will never meet the perfect girl, you will never find the perfect job, or live in the perfect city.

So…what’s the bright side Tony? You depressing bastard.

Well, you can be fine with being incomplete.

Find contentment doing what you are doing right now. And don’t worry about pleasing everyone. It’s impossible. There are too damn many people. There are enough people that if you died tomorrow and the world decided to visit your grave, they could stop in pairs to drop flowers and the line would circumvent the globe 497 times. Flowers would be extinct.

When I was a journalist, readers would write me to complain about my viewpoints. I had poor taste in music, art and literature; my movie reviews were wrong, my ideas were weak. I thought, of course, how did I ever manage to get published?

When I was a musician they would talk shit about my music–behind my back, of course. “How did he score a gig with (insert cool band), he’s not good enough.” It wasn’t because we spent countless hours, five days a week, practicing our craft; it was because we knew the right promoters. I almost believed them.

Now that I’m a dating coach I’m constantly criticized, ridiculed and condemned by faceless internet trolls. It’s rEdiculous. But I’m making money now, coaching sixteen hours a week, changing lives and improving my own. And I have time to write all day. I have beautiful women in my life. What do I care if someone thinks I’m a douchebag? Well, I’m not that gangsta yet. Working on it. 27 years of being told to “just be nice” can take a toll on your subconscious. Advanced Self-Dev is like rooting out weeds in the desert.

Worse than the mainstream ignoramus are pua community know-it-alls. They’ve seen a dozen RSD and Simple Pickup videos, yet, they’ve never implement the knowledge. And woo-boy do they have opinions! They love to post comments on social media; they’re emotional knee jerkers and the same archetypes that worship mystical dieties and could have thrived under McCarthyism. They try a few EBook tactics, give up and seek solace and companionship in the hater forums (I won’t link them. Rule number 1. Don’t feed the Trolls).

So what condemns us to the black, no-moon-tar of infinite melancholy?

Fear.

Fear of being ostracized, judged, condemned and criticized. But it’s not 1692 and this isn’t Guantanamo Bay. So chins up.

Many of my ideas might be wrong. But what can’t be argued is that I put in the work. Most people are parrots. I don’t mean to be a misanthrope; I love humans…but fear them. Have you seen Game of Thrones? Yeah. We’re mad, completely insane. We’re only one dictatorship away from mass beheadings.

Thankfully it’s 2012 and we have free speech (though I have yet to track readers none from North Korea). So take up space and raise your voice. Prepare yourself for stones and arrows, and accept the criticism with open arms because you’re a new age, self-actualizing, vagina pounding, blog reading Alpha male–and damn proud of it.

And here is a good reason to ignore the haters.

You are doing something, and They are talking about it.

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