How To Avoid The Friend-Zone

One thing I’ve learned about women—if you want them to be your girlfriend, you need to sleep with them as soon as possible.

If you go into the friend zone, you will probably never get out.

Women HATE this concept. They think that all us pickup guys care about is fast sex with multiple women. (It is pretty fun I must admit, when it happens.)

In my experience, the faster you have sex with her, the easier it is to make her your girlfriend. The reason is that she will backwards rationalize why she slept with you.

“He was really cute.”

“He’s really fun.”

“He is very smart.”

Now, I’m not talking so much about the drunken hookup. But even then, those fast party hookups have a higher chance of evolving into a longer term relationship than going on twenty-two dates over three months. The reason? Over the long term, she can back out anytime she wants—especially if she realizes you will provide her with friendship, and she can save her sex as a bargaining chip for someone better. 

It is in the girl’s best interest NOT to sleep with you quickly, as this will cement your investment. I mean, if you worked so hard for her, she must really be special, right? We tend to value that which we worked hard for and earned.

So there’s a dichotomy here.

Get to know her over time, or bang her as fast as possible?

I have plenty of attractive female friends whom I don’t sleep with…anymore. Most of them are women I did sleep with at some point but it didn’t work out, and we’re still great friends! We probably wouldn’t be friends if we didn’t bang in the past, because I don’t hang out with women I haven’t slept with on regular occasion like I would a close friend or lover. It’s not even a rational decision. It’s sort of dumb and I’m learning a different way of being. But…it’s how I’ve been able to sleep with and date beautiful women, who otherwise would have friend zoned me, and then not been my friend. 

When a woman starts sleeping with a new guy, they tend to ignore the other men in their lives. So, it’s best that man is you.

It’s better to try your hardest to seduce a girl into bed, rather than spending a lot of time and effort becoming her best friend in the hope that she will one day be yours.

If you just want to be her friend, it probably means she likes you more than you like her. A friendship with the opposite sex usually involves an unwritten contract that says, “We are not going to sleep together.” But usually this remains vague, and unstated, leading to unhealthy friendships.

Generally speaking:

Women see a relationship as the benefit of sex.

Men see sex as the benefit of a relationship.

Most women find great value in male companionship, and see giving their sex away freely as detrimental to that type of relationship. Men are a bit more stoic. We don’t always need people to keep us happy. We find strength in our solitude. But in order to feel that “closeness” with women, we want ALL of the woman. We want to be inside of her body, and soul.

This sexual desire makes it difficult for us to “Just be friends.”

Having female friends is great. But if you want that girl to be more than friends, try to bang her as quickly as she will allow. Otherwise you will always be one bad hangout away from the friend zone.

In my opinion, you will be better friends if you sleep together. Just don’t be a needy bitch about it. Don’t be jealous, or possessive, or overly eager for a long term relationship. Let her come to you for that. Just focus on making the sex happen, and then hold back the intimacy a little. She will chase you for a relationship  to rationalize all the fucking, and you will have yourself a girlfriend.