Don’t Try To Understand Them
Sometimes I feel like a big phonie, because in reality, I know very little about women.
I’ve read all the pickup books. I’ve watched all the dvds. I’ve gone out to countless clubs and bars. I’ve dated dozens of them. I’ve had long term relationships. And after all this, the one thing I know most about them, is that I don’t know much.
I will never be a girl.
I know what attracts girls, but I don’t know how they think, or why they do what they do.
It’s important that you understand why this is good: It alleviates your desperate need to understand, “Why?”
Why did she flake on me? Why after all that flirtation did she run off with her friends without even saying goodbye? Why is my girlfriend suddenly mad at me, even though I did nothing wrong, or different? Why isn’t she down for sex, even though she likes me? Why does she spend two hours doing her makeup, and then decide she doesn’t want to go out? Why doesn’t she like fish? Why won’t she hold eye contact with me? Why did she give me her Facebook if she never answers my messages?
Wondering, “why,” is an efficient path to insanity, because women are insane? Not clinically, but they have no fucking clue why they do the things they do. Sure they know why they want to teach yoga, and why they want to go to school, and why they want new shoes. But beyond the practical and into the present moment, they’re almost completely blown about by their emotions and whims.
Men like straight paths, from A to Z. We see the goal, it’s right there. Something needs to be done? No problem, we do it (except for the lazy guys). Again, I’m not talking about fixing a fence. A woman can fix a fence. But I’m talking about the emotional decisions. Like the choice to go on a date, or not. To enjoy dinner, or complain. To move to France, or stay in Wisconsin.
Men, you will never understand women, and they will never understand us. Just do what you need to do, and let them enjoy the freedom they’ve fought so hard for.
I read Snap: Making the Most of First Impressions, Body language, & Charisma by Patti Wood and she had quite a bit to say about the female view point that helped me understand a few things. One thing mentioned was that men and other objects were sort of like furniture in their mind, different areas that they would move to when the time came around to it. She covered filtering as well. Of course these things are sort of negative, but she went over positive stuff for body language and how to act a certain away & also pointed out about how looking good was very important (recommended getting a full size mirror to view yourself). I liked her point about showing full frontal body language attraction when first meeting a woman, and then turning the body away a certain degree not to scare her off with aggression/dominance.
I really hate that my mind asks me the question about women & why they do what they do, but the question has led me to this website & quite a few other places & several books & YouTube videos as well. I’ve learned a lot (but still have a long way to go) & wish that I had had this arsenal of skill available when I was younger, having then never figured out what worked & what didn’t & stumbling into success back in the old days.