That’s Not Her Boyfriend

I was at my favourite bar last night, just hanging out with a few friends, and there was this couple in the corner. The girl was very attractive and the guy was equally healthy. They were alone and facing each other across a small, candle lit table.

I said to my friend, “Wow, she looks great.”

My friend replied, “Yeah. We were talking about her. She’s with that guy though. Oh well.”

One thing I’ve learned over the years is that things aren’t always as they appear. New guys always make assumptions. They give up at the first hurdle, or don’t even try.

I watched the couple for several minutes before approaching their table. I look to the guy and say, “I’ve only had two pints and I’m feeling tipsy. You two have been here all night. You must be sloshed.”

He looks at me, smiles and replies in a thick Irish accent, “Well a little bit. But I’ve been nursing my beer ya see.”

“Oh, you’re Irish! Are you on Vacation?”

“Nah. I’m not. But ma sister here is.”

And there it was. I ended up sitting and talking to the brother and sister for 30 minutes. They were happy to have some company. In the end I left with her phone number and a date, fully sanctioned and approved by the brother.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen this. It’s either her Brother, co worker, room mate, Cousin, gay friend. Almost never the boyfriend.

I can usually call the relationship after a couple minutes. Are they touching each other? Lovers will usually make small caresses or kisses. Are they deeply engaged? Do they look deeply into each others eyes when they talk? Most first dates are easy to spot because the guy looks totally try-hard.

But the best way to find out is to march over and ask. “How do you guys know each other?” Of course, build some rapport first. But most of the time that girl will be available. And if she’s with a guy that looks like a date, then you are probably the only guy that night to make a pass at her. Bonus points for bravado.

Pay the guy some respect and if he likes you, he’ll usually let you run your game. He will probably respect your courage. I’ve even had guys compliment me and ask for my number to have, “beers.”

I was at a club with a bunch of girls. This guy walks up to me and say’s, “Hey man. I love that shirt.”

“Oh thanks. How’s your night?” I reply. We chat for a few minutes and he’s a cool guy. Then after our meeting, he turns around and starts talking to our girls. I knew what was up…but I liked him, and so did the girls. We ended up partying all night and he dated one of my friends for a couple of months.

The only way to learn the game is to play.

Feel free to comment. Let me know if you have any experiences with this.