My Friends Are Losers. Should I Find New Friends?

“My Friends don’t support my goals. Should I cut them off?”

Yes.

You’ve probably heard the cliche, “You are the sum of your five closest friends.”

Yeah. It’s true.

Look at the ones you spend the most time with. What are their financial resources? How healthy is their family life? How strong and supportive is their social circle? Are they fun and stoked on life (at least trying)? Are they in decent or great shape? Are they moving up and forward in life, or downward into stagnation and depression? Are they clear in their life goals?

When you share your desire to grow and improve your life, do they applaud, or mock you?

If you want an average life, hang out with average people. If you want a life of freedom, experience and power, align yourself with those who not only have like-minded goals, but are already on their path.

These champions and leaders will not reach out to you. You’ll l have to find them. They don’t spend their time with small-players and newbies. They don’t hang out at dive bars or drink Pabst in the hipster park. Well, maybe they do. Anyway.

They might be found with their faces buried in good books, working with intense focus on a project, climbing a mountain, lifting at the gym, or on a date with a sexy girl, or a group of talented friends. They are producers, and they don’t have much time or energy for hanging out with losers. Not because they’re snobs, but because there’s very little free time for nonsense.

Producers don’t waste much time with Playstation games. They don’t have time to chill and drink beers at noon on a Tuesday during prime creative hours. They aren’t interested in gossip or petty conversation. They don’t whine and complain about how unfair their situation is. They understand that life will give back exactly what they put in.

Good friends have integrity and work ethic, and expect you to step up your game.

If you want a mediocre life, hang out with lazy, depressed people. If you want great riches, power, and adventure — if you want a life worthy of a great novel or movie; ditch the losers and start hanging out with producers. Hang out with people who won’t tolerate laziness, mediocrity and petty behaviour within their social circle. Hang out with people who will point out your flaws with constructive criticism and help you grow.

I’m not saying I’m perfect, or all of my friends are perfect. Far from it. I understand that friendships are difficult to develop. But if you want to rise above the sheep herd masses and achieve great success in dating, business, or health, you will need to align yourself with highly motivated friends.

I want to be:

• Wealthy
• Free
• On my purpose
• Aligned with powerful, interesting people

I want safety and comfort for my females, including my Mother and Sisters. I want choice of ambition for my brothers. I want sexual abundance, love abundance, and infinite spiritual growth.

Losers, no matter how nice and loyal they are, will still drag you down with their lazy habits and lifestyle choices.

Pickup artists primarily spend time flirting with women. If you want to learn how to approach women, hang out with guys who are good with them. If you don’t know anyone who is good with women, hire one.

Spend time with those who are experts in your interest, and serve their needs. This will build trust and loyalty in your mentor.

• Alcoholics drink
• Video gamers game
• Athletes play and exercise
• Entrepreneurs make money
• Artists create art
• Readers read
• Travellers travel
• Losers lose

So if you’ve decided what you enjoy doing, and want to achieve mastery in that field — make alliances with people who are great at doing that activity, and spend less time with the people who aren’t.

Success hangs out with success. This is the way it is, unfortunately.

“But I’m not successful at much.”

That’s ok, because success recognizes ambition. Ambition combined with focus is immediately recognizable by producers.

“But I like my friends.”

I like my friends too. But some of them will hold you back. They will use your time in ways that don’t benefit your growth. So rather than convert them, it’s better and easier to move ahead. They might see your success and happiness and join you. Or, they’ll masturbate themselves into coma.

I try to visit my old friends from time to time, just to see if they’ve changed their beliefs and habits. Most haven’t. So I’m working hard to make a name for myself in my chosen industry, to move up in my society and align myself with cool and powerful allies. I’m trying to make new friends too.

We all need friends. You can’t do it all on your own.

If you want to make more friends, find an activity. Maybe go to entrepreneur meetings, or join a sports team. Take dance lessons, magic lessons, acting lessons — and give people value.

Instead of being the guy who asks, “Where’s the party?” Be the guy who creates the party. Do things for others and you will become a very popular guy. This doesn’t necessarily mean giving your money and resources away. But be the guy who invites everyone to a dinner party, or a beach day. Be the guy who calls people to ask them how they’re doing. Be the guy who offers advice to up and comers. Be the guy that introduces people, hooks them up; the connector.

And when your old friends try to pull you to the depths of their mediocre oceans, cut the net. They’ll probably be swimming in the same spot when you come back to visit.