Pickup While Backpacking in South East Asia

I spent four months backpacking Southeast Asia.

In that time I visited three countries: Thailand, Cambodia, and Laos.

During this adventure I went on many, many dates, and ended up sleeping with a handful of beautiful young women. I wasn’t particularly interested in the Asian girls. Most, though cute, are either good girls that want you to meet their family on a first date, or gold digging whores whose pussies are destroyed by sex tourists.

Though, there are many shades of Asian woman, I’m not interested in debating their merits at this time. This is a guide to backpacker pickup. I spent most of my time hanging out with Europeans, Australians, Brits, Americans and fellow Canadian travellers.

If you are interested in the essential travel gear for men backpacking in South East Asia, check out my gear guide.

Thailand

My first week in Thailand I stayed in a backpacker resort on an island called Koh Chang. I had a hut on the beach that I paid 600 baht a night for ($20). It was air conditioned, with a great location just off the water, and within walking distance of many bars. I went out nightly to these bars with the intent of seducing a gap-year travelling-girl back to my chateau.

Though, I found night game to be nearly as difficult there as it was in North America. After five or six hangovers, I decided to change my strategy. I would go to bed early and wake early, and spend my evenings working on my novel.

I set up shop in my favourite café, a Thai owned restaurant, directly beside the tuk-tuk stop, where every thirty minutes mini-bus loads of backpackers would arrive for vacation. The process was the same; the bus would unload, and packs of new travellers would hop off, some in groups, some solo, and grab their backpacks to seek food and accommodation.

Openers for Backpacking

The new girls were easy to spot. They’d look somewhat lost, alone, and eager to meet new friends. My game was simple; I’d sit there, make eye contact, smile and wave them over. When they approached me I would say something simple, like, “Hello. Where are you coming from?” Then the conversation would move to the usual topics: How long they’ve been travelling, where they came from, and where they were going. After that, we’d make small talk. They’d ask me what there was to do in that town. Then I’d tell them about the local waterfalls, the elephant treks, the beach, the nightlife, etc.

The girls were almost always more than willing to sit and talk to me. The ratio of hot girls was high. There were often the loud, overweight, tattooed, dreadlocked type—usually Australians, Canadians, Brits and Americans. But amongst them were many curvy, beautiful young women from other parts of Europe and the world. There was no reason for them not to speak with me. Women travelling alone are at risk.

It’s in their best interest to meet a nice guy early on, for protection and social proof. As one of my girlfriends said to me, one night over a beachside dinner, “No woman wants to travel alone.” Back home, women have social choices. They’re rarely alone. They have friends from school, work, family and so on. On Koh Chang, women only had me, the first guy they met. On top of that, I was one of the most charming guys they’d ever met. Thanks Internet!

Activities

After that it was simple. I’d either invite them on an activity, like riding on the back of my scooter to a local waterfall, or a trip to the beach, or a hike. Or I’d meet them for lunch, or drinks, or a joint at my bungalow. It was really, really, easy to find a date. In my first five days in Koh Chang I had five dates, all from the same seat, in the same open-air restaurant.

After I hooked them into my tribe (a tribe of one) I would do my best to keep them away from other travellers, as the competition from tall, good looking European backpackers is high. The activities and adventures would quickly establish rapport. And once they found out about my job back home, as a dating coach, or they read some of my book, they’d be even more hooked on me.

Another way I met women was on activities. One day I paid $20 and went on an all day party-boat. Me and about thirty other young travellers sailed around, drinking, barbecueing, and snorkelling in the tropical sun. All the girls were in their bikinis and the sexual party vibe was high. Everyone was in the same, err, boat: Travelling alone or in a small group, far from home in an exotic land. After the six hour cruise, I had a social circle. Social circle backpacker game is something I’ll talk about in the future.

Location, Location

In every tourist town there were one or two locations that were ideal for meeting women, and they were rarely at night. My years spent honing my attraction techniques allowed me to meet and bang many beautiful women. Had I not spent the last eight years studying, practicing and teaching, I might have returned home without a single date. It’s not as easy as showing up and having pussy fall from the sky. You still have to approach, you still have to escalate, you still have to talk.

I learned that different girls from different cultural backgrounds require different game. Westernized girls like to lead, and are more masculine and less submissive. Girls from Eastern European countries are more submissive, and easier to lead. This is very generalized but it’s just an observation.

Check out this post on how to meet girls in hostels

What sorts of girls will you meet?

On my trip, I didn’t learn only about how to seduce women, but I learned how to be around beautiful women. I rarely went more than three days before meeting a group of girls. I went for the most beautiful, usually girls from The Netherlands, Australia, Germany, Sweden, and other European countries.

Most of the hottest girls had boyfriends back home, proven by their Facebook pages (though that didn’t stop them all from sleeping around. There’s lots of cheating going on). Even when these girls were loyal, I would still travel with them on buses, trains, etc. I spent hundreds of hours talking to beautiful women about dating, relationships, sex, culture.

It’s not always easy

I also had my soul destroyed several times. Early on in Laos I met two gorgeous 21 year olds from The Netherlands. I travelled with them for five days. One had a boyfriend back home, and the other was single, and very flirtatious. But not matter what I tried, she wouldn’t hook up with me. She was attracted to the very tall, the very handsome, and much younger men. Though, she never slept with any, not while I was around.

No amount of game was going to convince her, even though she was attracted, to sleep with me. Not with her friend around. I learned the biggest detriment to getting laid with backpackers was social pressure. Just like at home, it’s much, much easier to sleep with women who are alone. This is why I love daygame. It’s much easier to find women who are reading, or shopping, alone.

If you are having trouble with your game, I highly suggest overseas travel to a place like Se Asia, where other travellers are seeking adventure. Most people are in travellers mind, and very open to meeting new people, unlike your hometown, where most likely, they are closed and suspicious of strange men approaching them.

Check out this article that cover the essential travel gear for travelling South East Asia.