How To Make Out With Girls in Bars

(Reader Mail Time! Hooray.)

I love your blog. The field reports are to the point but written without a lot of pua lingo.

You’re telling a story about attracting women and your philosophy on why it’s working. One question I have, how do you get over that physical barrier from touching on the arm, to kissing?

I’m able to go out and approach women, get numbers, but I’m not kissing or making out with them. I grew up in a really religious household, so I don’t have a lot of sexual experience (save for one high class escort when I was 23 and living in a hotel and couldn’t take it anymore) so I don’t mind being the tacky bar/club make out guy for a while.

Thanks for the props! I also don’t like pua lingo and try to avoid it.

So the question is how to make out with girls you just met in party environment.

The question isn’t “What do I do?” It’s “What do I want?”

With that mindset anything is possible.

You have to believe that kissing strange women at bars and parties is totally normal and people do it every day. Because it’s true.

I’ve been all over the world to all kinds of bars and parties, and I’ve made out with all sorts of women. When I realized how incredibly easy and almost meaningless making out at bars was, it changed my life!

Well, it didn’t really change my life. I just kissed a lot more women, which was nice.

Now for practical application of how to make out with girls at bars. You need to start with plenty of touching. I know that sounds creepy “Hehehe…touches the girl” (Golem like), but it’s actually the easiest way to establish a physical connection with a girl you just met.

As soon as possible go from verbal to physical.

You could be playing with her jewelry and lightly brushing her neck, or ears.
When you talk about the environment, put your arm around her shoulder as you gesture at something in the bar.
You can hold her hand as you talk.
You could hug her or initiate a neck massage.
You might smell her perfume and brush your lips on her neck.

If you are making all of these physical steps and she’s not moving away, she’s comfortable…she’s probably down for a kiss or make out.

Here’s one of my favourite techniques. I lean in close to her face, stare at her lips and breathe like a bull, but just when the sexual tension is really high, I lean back and turn my head. It fries her circuitry. “Why doesn’t he kiss me? I know he can. He knows he can!”

Sexual tension needs to be high.

Then, when she thinks you’re about to kiss her, you don’t.

keep leaning in and preparing a kiss in her mind. I call this “Priming.” She needs to know a kiss is on the way. So when you finally do lean in, slowly, she’ll open her mouth just slightly in anticipation.

Then when the tension is thick… you go for it. Put your lips on her lips.

The Aggressive Bar Make out

Or alternatively… you can walk straight up and say, “Makeout time!” Grab her hips, pull them into yours, put both your hands on either side of her face, pull it in and shove your tongue in her mouth.

This takes some big balls and I say “At your own risk.” But if you have good game this totally blows their minds and gets them attracted very, very quickly. Note, do not try this on strangers at the bar or you may get punched. You should have some level of attraction from the girl already.

What you are testing for is compliance. Is she ready to submit to you? Is she moving away?

Making The Bold Move

Now I would say as a newbie, 9 times out of 10 she will reject your first kiss attempt. She’ll turn her cheek or back away or say, “Ummm…no thanks.”

This does not mean she doesn’t want to kiss you! This just means, “Not yet.”

She rejected your kiss attempt… not YOU. Do not give up. Wait, build up more attraction with verbal and physical flirtation, and then try again later.

Move her around the bar to build more connection. Keep getting physical. Move her away from her judgemental friends and then try again. It may be social pressure that’s keeping her inner slut at bay.

This is a golden line to makeout with a girl in a bar, or even on a date:

“From one to ten, how good a kisser are you?”

It doesn’t matter what her reply is. All you’re doing is priming her for the kiss.

You want to get her to see you as a lover. You want her to imagine what it would be like to kiss you. Kissing is very enjoyable for everyone, but a girl usually needs to mull it over for a few minutes before deciding.

On the other hand you could just go caveman and maul the girl. The reason this works is because women respond to authority and dominance. So if you have NO DOUBT IN YOUR MIND that you can TAKE a kiss from her, then she will accept it.

NOTE! This does not mean you should be a kiss rapist! This does not mean if she repeatedly says “No” you should be relentless. Keep it light.

Keep it playful Go for the makeout whenever you want to, but respect her when she actually means “no.” (Note. Every girl wants to kiss you. They just don’t know it yet.)

Remember, whatever you feel, she feels. If you feel like making out with her is normal and fun, she will sense your frame and follow. If you feel it’s “Not the right time” she will feel the same. This is critical.

You do it when you want to, with no doubt, no fear, no indecision and you’ll be the tacky makeout guy. Personally I believe it’s a stage we all need to go through.

Just check for cold sores.

How To Make Out With Girls in Bars