Escalation is Attractive – The Escalation Ladder

Have you ever met a girl, scored a date and you thought you were golden, only to have it fizzle out and she ghosts you, or says, “I’m just not looking for a relationship right now”?

While most guys think this is because they don’t know, “what to say,” it’s usually because they missed their escalation window. 

I’ll explain what the escalation window means. 

Escalation is Attractive 

In the pua scene ten years ago there was a guy who called himself, “60 Years of Challenge.” He coined the phrase, “Escalation is Attractive,” and, “Risk Being Creepy,” amongst others. 

His book, titled after his name, is off the market but you can still find it if you look hard enough. It was one of the best seduction books out there. It was a counter to the routine based movement, and stripped a lot of the silliness out of pickup artistry and brought it back down to earth. 

There was also another pua named Vin Dicarlo who created a seduction roadmap called the Escalation Ladder. The escalation ladder was a series of steps that involved touch. It demonstrated the least to most erogenous zones to touch a girl, and how you should start with light touches on her hands, and then move towards more intimate areas. 

In this article I’m going to focus on, “Escalation is Attractive.” 

What is Escalation?

Escalation is any step that moves you closer towards sex. We call this an escalation ladder. 

Think of a ladder, and at the bottom, you haven’t even met the girl. Then you start up the ladder. 

• You approach her (escalation)
• You flirt with her (escalation)
• You add some light touch (escalation)
• You ask for her number (escalation) 
• You take her out for a date and flirt more (escalation)
• … and finally take her to bed and make sweet, pounding love to latin funk

If you fail to execute these steps, you fall back down the ladder and must begin again. 

Open Windows

Girls will give you signals when they want you to escalate. If you know how to talk to girls, how to touch them, and how to make them horny, you will keep getting open windows. 

But if you fail to escalate in a smooth manner, the escalation window will close, and you’ll be making love to your hand. 

Failing to take the windows means you’re not a confident guy. Many girls get tricked. A guy approaches them, asks them out, and then on their date bores them to tears with typical nice guy shit. 

Windows don’t stay open forever. 

Her Buying Temperature

Most guys struggle with, “what to say.” Even if they’ve read my books, watched my YouTube videos, and studied my courses, they still struggle. This is mostly because they lack field experience. They research and research but never practice. This is called, “Mental masturbation.” 

They also suffer from, “nice guy syndrome”; the fear of coming across as creepy or too aggressive prevents them from making the proper escalations, and so the window closes, and the girl loses interest. 

Think of her attraction as a buying temperature. It’s like a thermometer that goes up and up during the course of your date. If you fail to keep it hot, the temperature falls. 

Because guys struggle with what to say, and don’t want to creep her out, they play the nice guy game, acting polite, speaking very little, and not taking risks. This means her temperature falls and they get slotted into the friend zone. 

When in Doubt, Escalate

If you’re not sure what to do next, or you don’t know what to talk about… escalate. 

There are many ways to escalate, both physically and verbally: 

Touch

You can find many excuses to introduce touch to your date. 

Actually, it will really hurt your chances if you don’t touch her often. 

Here are some excuses to touch her: 

Comment on part of her clothing, jewellery, hair or a tattoo and then use this to add touch.

Here are some articles If you want to know signs a girl wants you to touch her, or how to touch a girl. 

Sex Talk 

Talking about sex is always fun. You can bring it up directly or indirectly. 

1. “I heard my neighbours having sex last night. They were so loud it was crazy.” 
2. “What’s the craziest place you’ve ever had sex?” 

A lot of guys will feel like it’s weird or creepy to bring up sex. But the trick is you must be comfortable with your sexuality and the topic, and then she will be too. You must lead. 

If you get her thinking about sex it’s inevitable that she’ll think about having sex with you. 

Tease Her 

Girls love being teased. Think of her like your bratty little sister. 

“You’re so cute I could put you in my pocket.” 

“It’s funny how your nose wiggles when you smile.” 

How to tease a girl is a skill you can develop with practice. 

Kiss Her 

Trying to kiss a girl is a major escalation. Don’t worry if she turns her cheek and rejects the first try. Most girls will. 

The key is to wait a bit and then try again, and again. Because escalation is attractive, unless she says, “Stop trying to kiss me,” then she’ll just get more and more attracted every time you try. 

Eventually she’ll cave in and let you kiss her. 

Tell Her She Turns You On

You can always just tell her you’re being turned on. This is basically going direct. 

“You look so hot tonight.” 

“I’m trying so hard not to kiss you.” 

“Did you dress up like that just for me?” 

Women love the feeling of being desired and it can crank up their buying temperature. 

Get Her Alone

I met this hottie in Bangkok and she wasn’t quite sure about me. I kept flirting with her, but she wouldn’t let me kiss her. 

I made a plan. I told her I was shopping for a new place to stay, so I took her into several hotels and just asked to see the rooms. Later that night, I rented one and had sex in it. 

She later told me when we were alone in these rooms she started thinking, “Oh my god, we could have sex in here right now.” The idea of being alone with me was enough to crank up her buying temperature. 

If you’re not able to escalate her, try to get her alone with you, either in your place, hers, or somewhere private. 

Conclusion

These are a few ways you can turn up her buying temperature through escalation. 

Just a reminder. There is:

Physical escalation, and verbal escalation. 

If you put it together, you’ll get her romantic vibe cranked up quickly, because escalation is attractive. 

Even if you get rejected, at least she knows you’re not a simp. If she hangs out with you, there is zero chance you’ll become her friend. 

Until next time. 

Tony.