Daytime Dating, A Rough Guide, Part 2
You can find Part 1, here.
Now you’ve found a location and you’re ready to pimp up a new girlfriend or two.
You’ve got your nose hair trimmed, you’re in a good mood and your body language is tight.
Now I’ll explain the verbal and physical aspect of approaching in various situations.
Direct vs Indirect:
Direct game is when you make a direct statement like, “Hi. I thought you looked great and wanted to introduce myself. I’m Tony.”
Indirect is when you make a situational, or hypothetical question or statement before moving onto flirtation. This could take many forms, like asking for directions, or commenting on her clothing, or the weather, or a book, or any random comment your heart desires.
If I had to state a preference I would choose indirect, as it keeps the defences low. However, as a newb, you should first master the direct approach. It’s the scariest, and once you can go direct, you can always fall back on it. Honesty is a powerful tactic. It shows you have balls. If you are too scared to tell a woman you’re attracted to her, why should she be attracted to you? I’d say, practice both styles.
- The approach: On the street, the angle of approach doesn’t really matter. If you come from behind, I prefer to pass by, then look over my shoulder and say, “Hello.” If I come from the front, I like to wave before stopping and saying, “Hello.”
Sometimes I’ll lightly touch her shoulder to establish kino. This is usually fine, and shouldn’t freak her out if you’re not freaked out. If you creep her out, chuckle and try again until you stop creeping girls out.
The trick is to make her stop. If you approach at an intersection, realize that once the light turns green, she’s going to walk. So you should turn her body away from the intersection. It’s as easy as moving your own body, and even using a, “come hither,” motion to draw her away from the intersection. In my bootcamps, we practice moving girls from point A to point B. This is called compliance.
If she’s sitting, somewhere like a bookstore or foodcourt, you can approach with your opener, direct or indirect, and then ask, “I have a few minutes, do you mind if I sit.” Or, “Can I sit?” or you can just sit down without asking, as some of my students prefer.
2. What to say: Verbal game comes naturally to some, and takes great effort for others. The good news is you can improve your verbal game with practice. I won’t get into too much detail here as it’s a huge subject, but generally if you follow these rules, you’ll do fine.
– Always positive. Don’t talk about how the weather or the food sucks. Everything is great.
– Avoid logic. Chicks don’t want to hear about politics. Talk about emotional subjects like travel, music or adventure. Elicit her values. Find out who she is, and what she’s into. In the old days Push/Pull was used a lot. That’s where you tease the girl relentlessly and disqualify yourself. This is a good skill to have, but realize, you will suck at it and probably piss girls off. Practice on your own time. For now, just worry about getting into set and staying in for two minutes. Talk about boring things if you have to. Don’t worry about her. Just worry about gaining experience until you’re not nervous anymore.
2. Kino: You need to make physical contact. A university did a study where they took 100 men and had them use the same, direct opening line, without kino. They then did the same experiment but added kino. The group that touched the girl lightly on the hand, or shoulder, had a significantly higher number-close rate. It’s as simple as a lingering handshake, or a high five, or a touch on the shoulder, waist or knee. It’s up to you.
3. Vocal projection: You don’t need to be as loud as in bar game, but the girls need to hear you. Take a friend and make him stand ten feet away, and then tell him a story. If he can’t hear every word, you are too quiet. This is a major betrayer of insecurity. Be loud. Be proud. Be confident.
4. Closing: You can either get her phone number, Facebook, or go on an insta-date. Too many guys eject and walk away before the interaction is over. I can’t count the times I’ve turned a guy around and sent him running back after the girl, only to have them return, beaming, with a new girls number in their phone. Remember your ABC’s: Always Be Closing. Even if you don’t really like her, do it for practice so it becomes a natural reflex.
5. Groups vs Solo: Groups are fine to approach. You can still go direct, “I thought you guys looked nice, but I had to meet this girl.” Or indirect, “Hi guys, do you know where the nearest Starbucks is? This way? Let’s walk together.”
6. Insta-date: You could have an insta-date. If she’s not in a rush, just ask her, “Do you have ten minutes? Let’s grab a coffee.” I like to say, “ten minutes,” because it’s low risk, low investment. If after ten minutes you are getting along, you could spend the day, or the night together.
Endgame:
Daygame is really, really easy once you have some confidence. You don’t have to deal with many cockblocks, the girls aren’t disguised by loads of makeup and dark lights, they haven’t been approached a hundred times by desperate, drunk men. Even if you’re rejected, you’ll probably never see them again, and they’ll go back to tell their friends about the funny guy that hit on her at Barnes and Noble.
I know a guy that went out every day for one year and approached hundreds of girls. It took him three months to get his first date. This is normal. For many greener guys, it takes longer. Realize, daygame is not an ideal way to meet women. Social circle is much easier, but the skills and experience you will gain from practicing will improve your ability with all women. When the time comes, you’ll know what to do and say.
Pickup is not a lifestyle, it’s a skillset. Practice with the mind of improving yourself, improving your life and gaining knowledge. Trust that in the end, your hardwork will pay off.
Daygame is not rocket science. Don’t think so hard on it. Just go out, and try for yourself. You’ll learn more by approaching one woman than reading 100 blog posts.
You can watch many daygame videos on Youtube. Daygame.com and Simple Pickup are two good sources for infield footage.
If you are using canned routines, that’s ok. It will help develop your skillset. But realize, they are training wheels and every conversation is a two way street. It’s not all up to you. The women have their own ideas and personalities. Some are masculine, some are submissive, some are smart, some dumb, some single, some taken. Most hot girls have boyfriends. That’s just part of the game.
It’s a numbers game, and a skill game, and a luck game. The more you play, the higher your odds of scoring.
If you’re into nightgame, daygame will help hone those skills, and vice versa. If you only practice one situation, you will be severely limited in your ability to attract the hottest girls.
This is a really quick intro to daygame. I’ve been posting a lot of advanced stuff lately, so I wanted to give something for the newbies. Go try it. I’ve dated some of the hottest girls in my life from day game. I hope you meet your dream slut too.
Solid advice. Thank you for writing this!
This is great Tony. Thanks to the tips presented in your blog posts, I’ve started playing the day game with a good rate of success: 1 great date out of approx 25 approaches. I would recommend the beginners to get a job in sales, get good at that, and then use the sales skills towards dating. It’s just great.
You rock Tony.
Daygame is really, really easy once you have some confidence, yet It took him three months to get his first date???
Hi Tony:
what’s your technique to get a girl on the phone during the day to stop talking on her phone? Do you demand she gets off or simply talk over her phone convo until she’s persuaded to get off? I’ve seen the former talked about by Badboy and demonstrated by Julien, but I’ve had varying success with it.
Nice! I also prefer indirect over direct as it allows me more time to game the girl and has higher success rate, but direct game can be fun and work as well. Going direct definitely boosts my state up.
Hi Tony.
great site!
i’v got a theory maybe you can back me up with.
all this conversation game is unimportent, the only thing that matters is confidence and logistics.
once you get a girl to stand infront of you – kiss her
once your somewhere private – bang her
i mean humans use to procreant way before they started talking.
i did it at a party once and plan on doing it at daytime. just stand infront of a girl, look into her eyes and slowly go in for a kiss without saying a word.