The Beautiful Crazy Mind of The Romantically Dissatisfied Millennial Girl

This article harbours great insight into the contradicting desires of the 20 something millennial girl. A girl who grows up in an age of instant gratification, an age of digital stimulus on demand, where you can peer into the lives of others on whim to compare with your own mediocrity. Where every first world kid can travel the globe, document and share the whole process in real time. A world where we’re taught to be sluts, but get married and have kids, to be kind and good, while debauching ourselves in foreign countries. What a confusing mess.

Let’s break this down.

I don’t want someone who lets me win every argument in order to make his or her life easier. I want someone who cares enough about me that he or she thinks I’m worth the fight.

Translation: I want a bad boy who will fight with me for the sake of drama, because he understands that I crave something real in a world where our emotions have been dulled by technology.

If you spend hours per day stimulating yourself with Internet validation, reading stories about rockstars and celebs, and enviously perusing the Facebook travel posts of others—you’re bound to feel a bit bored by a regular, nice-guy joe with a 9-5 job.

Life is beautifully messy. I want someone who embraces my imperfections and thrives in the whirlwind of life, rather than just fights against it.

Translation: I’m a wild ass party girl. I like to dance until 4 am, sniff coke, mdma, and bang hot dudes in the after party toilet. My life is falling apart, I’m documenting it all on Instagram, and I want you to write a song about it to jam at your next gig. Please don’t point out my narcissistic self destruction. It’s annoying. 

Lest ye be judged, or whatever. Everybody got that participation ribbon, and here are the results. Poets, all of us. Poets who have never experienced hunger, pain, or loss. The shallow stream sings blue for lonely fish.

I don’t want someone to hear me; I want someone to listen to me.

I crave a real connection. I crave a connection that cuts deeper than just kind, simple words. I don’t want someone to tell me only the pretty little things that I want to hear.

I want someone who listens.

There is an acute difference between hearing a person and listening to a person. Hearing is on the surface — anyone can easily hear another entity spew words.

Listening takes effort. Listening is connecting. Listening is collaborative. Listening is looking into another person’s eyes and allowing the words to not just process in your ears but resonate in your heart.

Translation: I want someone I’m really attracted to. I don’t want a boring nice guy. I want a bad ass rock star who will make me feel like I’m a bad ass rockstar.

Men really do suck at listening. I admire women for their ability to absorb and remember every thing I say. It’s almost scary how good they are at it. The problem is, men don’t listen to women in order to understand what they are saying, they listen in order to get in their pants.

A simple Jedi mind trick to help you listen to women and actually hear them: Imagine a cord of energy going from your abdomen to hers, that blocks out all outside interference. This will put you into the present moment. You can learn a lot about women when you become present to their message. The problem is most men are didactical listeners, and don’t really understand poetic nuance. Often what a women says has nothing to do with what she means. Try to feel what she feels instead. Feel her joy, feel her pain, feel her laughter, feel her anger, and empathize. She’ll appreciate and reward this level of attention. Maybe with a blowjob!

I don’t ever want to date a carbon copy of myself. I understand how I operate.

Translation: Stop agreeing with every damn thing I say. It shows me you are weak and easily manipulated. 

If she loooooves chocolate milk, and you don’t, then don’t fucking pretend you love chocolate milk. It makes you fat and causes diabetes. Command respect for speaking truth rather than supplicating to score points. Get off your white horse you pansy. Don’t mock her fondness for Woody Allen movies or anything. Just don’t be a “Me too!” guy.

I don’t want someone to settle down with me; I want someone to go on wild adventures with me.

I have an instant reaction to the word “settle” — a pain instantly surfaces in the deepest pit of my stomach.

Why would I ever want to settle for anything?

Translation: I have all my needs met. I have an apartment, a decent job, a university education, a supportive family and peer group. I don’t need a man to provide for or protect me. I don’t need a house in the suburbs. I don’t know what I want! Will you provide me with the emotional stimulation to feel like my life isn’t meaningless? Let’s go pop some molly and go clubbing. Wanna go to Thailand next week? I want a little danger in the far too safe existence. Can you provide this for me? I want to be wild. Will you be wild with me?

Millennials are wealthy. Wealth breeds freedom, but also a strong nihilistic boredom.

Millennial women grew up on social media, where if you’re not a model, a You Tube star, a rockstar, a globe trotting party girl, a best selling memoir author…then you’re just not worth anything. It’s a lot to live up to and a difficult image to maintain. If your life doesn’t feel and look like a music video, then you’re just missing out on life. Trust me, I know. I feel the same way.

I don’t want routine; I want passion

I don’t want every day to be exactly the same. I don’t want to have the same conversations over the same meal every single night for the rest of my life.

I want a blazing passion that sparks a fire within me. I want to be with someone who makes my heart skip a beat and whose touch attains the ability to light up my entire body.

Translation: Dudes are so logical and booooooooring. Give me my damn emotional rollercoaster!

And we are. That’s why I teach men improvisation; to become renaissance men, to travel the world, read great books, have interesting hobbies, to be bad boys and bang lots of chicks. Because that’s what millennial girls crave in men above all else—entertainment and adventure. Or at least that’s what they think. It’s something they usually grow out of, depending on whether they want a family or not.

A lot of what the author has stated above, her desires, are men’s desires as well. We also crave adventure, connection, romance, success, love, and plenty of hot sex with beautiful people from all corners of the globe.

We want to ride that motorcycle with you, we want to fuck on a beach in South America, we want to cuddle all night and talk about our dreams. Except, we want it with four or five women a month instead of just one forever.

Let’s hope we can meet somewhere in the middle.

Girls. We’re listening. We’re trying. We’re just men. Don’t hate us for it. And most of all, don’t depend on us to fill that empty void. That’s your job. If you build it, he will come.